Screen Shots: Monday, July 29th, 2024

Welcome to Screen Shots! This is where I tell you what you should watch on TV. It’s going to be a very sports-centric list since that’s really the only thing we have left that you simply must watch live. Speaking of watching things, you should watch me on YouTube! Have your own suggestions? Shoot me an email at [email protected]!

It’s always fun to see the host nation win their 1st gold medal of the Olympics. The French Rugby Sevens team defeated Fiji to get the medal party started in Paris. This was extra notable as Rugby Sevens has only been an Olympic sport since 2016. Fiji has been undefeated in Olympic play, including their country’s first medal in any event, until falling to France on Saturday.

France was led by Antoine Dupont. As an American, I’m bound by the Constitution to bring up football when discussing rugby. Dupont makes that easy as he’s built exactly like former NFL player Maurice Jones-Drew. As the fullback has disappeared from football, it seems like a natural transition to turn yesterday’s fullbacks into today’s rugby stars. Someone should look into why this hasn’t happened yet. I would do it myself, but I’m busy. To the events!

Men's or Women's Beach Volleyball: 3 a.m. ET - 4 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com 

Why you should watch: These vague listings are always tough for me. Beach volleyball is always fun to watch, even if I spend most of the time trying to figure out how they don’t get sand in their eyes. At some point, you should see former NBA player Chase Budinger competing for Team USA. Here’s a cool article by Mirin Fader about going from the basketball court to the beach!

Men's Synchronised 10m Platform Final Medal event at 5 a.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: One time I took a gummy. A special gummy. As the story always goes, I took another gummy shortly after. These two gummies were two more than I’d ever had in my life up to that point. After laughing uncontrollably for 30 minutes, I spent the rest of my night furiously googling things like “how loud is your heart supposed to beat?” “is it possible for bad guys to put fentanyl in commercially packed gummies?” and “am I having a psychotic break?” As terrible as that was, I was infinitely less scared than I would be if you made me jump off a 33-foot platform into a pool.

Women’s Rugby at 8 a.m. ET - 4:30 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: I would need 8-10 months to recover from a single rugby match, but they make the teams play as many as possible in one day. It’s like they have to pay an event rental fee. At 10:30 a.m. ET, New Zealand takes on Fiji. New Zealand is looking to repeat as Olympic champions. Their star, Michaela Blyde, started crying tears of joy after seeing track superstar Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce at the Olympic Village. This is the only appropriate reaction to seeing Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce.

Women's Basketball: Canada vs. France at 11:15 a.m. ET on Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: I could do an entire post on all of the WNBA talent that will be on display in this one, but how funny would it be if Laeticia Amihere didn’t play all game and then when the game was over Canada’s coach ripped off a mask Scooby Doo-style to reveal they were Tanisha Wright?

Men's Artistic Gymnastics Team Final Medal event at 11:30 a.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: An “Olympic Expert,” which is what I consider myself, is someone who parachutes and pretends to know what the hell they’re talking about even though they only pay attention to the majority of these sports for a 2-week period every 4 years. Gymnastics is everybody’s favorite sport to do this with. A lot of that has to do with the fact that the scoring is done by judges and therefore is subjective. That means what I think can’t be wrong. I merely have a different opinion than the judges. Also, “pommel horse” both looks and sounds like a medieval torture device.

Women's Basketball: United States vs. Japan at 1 p.m. ET on USA Network, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: I wrote about the US women’s team here. This is a rematch of the Gold Medal game in Tokyo. These two teams played twice in those Olympics, and while Team USA won both times, Japan gave them all they could handle. Rui Machida is an absolute superstar. Almost always the smallest player on the court, but her impact cannot be measured. Her assists can be though, and she averaged a hilarious 12.5 assists per game in 25.5 minutes per game during Japan’s silver medal run to lead all players. She was ahead of 2nd place by 5 (FIVE!) assists per game.

Women's Field Hockey: Germany vs. Netherlands at 1:45 p.m. ET on Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: Field hockey feels like someone took a fun and exciting sport and put lawyers in charge of making the rules. These are two of the best teams, so you should at least get an idea of what the sport is supposed to look like by watching this one. The Dutch squad has won a record 9 World Cups and have made the podium in 9 of the 10 Olympics they’ve participated in. They will play amazingly in-between an unyielding barrage of referee whistles and reviews.

Women's Swimming: 400m Individual Medley Final Medal event at 2:30 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: This event is pure insanity. Competitors use all 4 strokes, switching every 100 meters. I’m always amazed at swimmers’ ability to keep track of what lap they’re on, so the ability to do that while remembering to switch strokes absolutely blows my mind. The order goes as follows: butterfly, backstroke, breaststroke, freestyle. However, the order changes slightly for relays, which only raises more questions that only Rowdy Gaines can answer.

Men's Swimming: 200m Freestyle Final Medal event at 2:43 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: Remember way back when I brought up Rowdy Gaines? He was once the world record holder in this event. He’s now become swimming’s Gus Johnson, which can be a polarizing role to play but personally, I enjoy it. As great as Rowdy is, the best 200m freestyle world record holder career transition belongs to Johnny Weissmuller, who became an actor. He had a 28-film run where he either played Tarzan or a character named “Jungle Jim,” who was based on a character from a comic strip. To portray Jungle Jim, he basically showed up on set and acted like himself to the point that Jungle Jim’s name was switched to “Johnny Weissmuller” for the final three films he appeared in. This is The Rock’s dream.

Men's Swimming: 100m Backstroke Final Medal event at 3:22 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com 

Why you should watch: This is the water equivalent of race walking, where you take a movement made for leisure and apply maximum effort.

Women's Swimming: 100m Breaststroke Final Medal event at 3:32 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: Okay, we’re scraping the bottom of the barrel with my swimming thoughts. I feel like every Olympic cycle, there’s at least one article on whether or not competitive swimmers pee in the pool where competitive swimmers explain how they’re always peeing in the pool. There are roughly 660,000 gallons of water in an Olympic-sized swimming pool according to the first result of my Google search. A normal pee is approximately 8 ounces. There are 128 ounces in a gallon or 16 adult pees. That means it would take 10,560,000 pees to fill up the pool. You’re welcome. 

Women's Swimming: 200m Freestyle Final Medal event at 3:48 p.m. ET on NBC, Peacock and NBCOlympics.com

Why you should watch: Come watch the greatest in the world pee in the pool! On a more serious note, Australians Mollie O’Callaghan and Ariarne Titmus are the 2 most recent world record holders. Titmus just took down Katie Ledecky in the 400m version of this one.

Happy watching!